Monday, November 28, 2011

Bag O' Goodies

So I realized something last week, and I had been meaning to do this for some time now, but I never seemed to get the chance to do it. That is, until today. Quite often, I talk about scening with Master, and I talk about all the fun stuff we do, and some of the items we use, but I've never really shown my readers what all is being used. So dig in, guys. I have a pleasant surprise for all of you today!

Here are our toys thus far. 

Newest addition to the fun. Glass dildo of the icicles collection.

Crop. ^.^

Our collection of gags.

Nipple clamps. <3

Mr. Thuddy, and Ms. Stingy. lol

Some miscellaneous things. Hoorah for bondage games. lol 

Play collars. The black one was given to us by Angel a long time ago.

Vaginal vibrator with wireless remote. Anal beads, and wartenburg wheel.

Can't forget rope!

Good ol' Cane of Doom. Made by Panda, and made for beating. 

Sunday, November 27, 2011

Great Weekend, Not So Great Ending

This weekend Master's parents were out of town, so as soon as my shift ended on Black Friday, it was off to Master's place for a nice relaxing weekend. Friday went by rather fast, but by the time I got back to Master's place, my whole body ached, and my legs and feet were feeling the worst of it. Luckily for me, Master loves to pamper me from time to time, so I had a nice surprise waiting for me. Master had prepared peppermint massaging oil for me, so once I got out of the shower, it was massage time. Turns out, Master had been reading the same book that I bought for our anniversary. 

I'm so lucky. ^.^

Master worked my body over with warm oil, all the while we were listening to a play list I made a few days prior that was meant for this sort of thing. Nothing but peaceful music in the air, the scent of peppermint and green tea lightly scenting the room, and to top it off, the room was also dimly lit. Quite romantic, really. Within minutes, I was starting to feel relaxed and the tension slowly drifted out of my body with each loving stroke of Master's hands. Needless to say, it was very relaxing.

The night ended with us trying out our brand new glass dildo of the icicles collection. It definitely gave some interesting and neat sensations, and of course, I just had to indulge in Master's cock. ^.^ Some passionate sex was had, and after cleaning ourselves up, we fell asleep almost immediately. The rest of the weekend was pretty laid back. We played some video games on the N-64 with one of His friends last night, and we got to bed kind of early. I was just so worn out from Friday. 

This morning we woke up around 10:30 and I got a shower in first thing. 

This evening took a turn for the worst, though. As I had mentioned not too long ago, Moose has been biting us again, and even bit me a couple weeks ago. To top it off, he tried biting me just a few days ago, completely unprovoked, and not much really happened after that.

During the weekend, we kept Moose in the front room where he had plenty of room to move around in there, and lounge on either of his two doggy beds. We'd let him out to use the bathroom a few times during the day, and Master would let him into the front room so he could be fed his food. The main reason we kept him away from us was to avoid getting bitten. 

Well.. all was dandy and fine when Master's parents came back home. Everyone had a safe trip and what-not, and Master's mothers' brother stopped by with his wife, and their granny. Moose was excited to see everyone and it seemed like everything was fine. 

Then, after Moose was put in the living room to keep from him getting under everyone's feet, he started barking. Clearly it was getting close to food time, but seeing as there were guests, Master's mom wanted to wait till they left so he could get calmed down and then feed him dinner. Instead, she asked Master to feed him a raw hide to tie him over for a little bit. 

This is where everything went from "okay" to "really bad".

Over a quick current of event's, Master was trying to step over Moose, to keep Kerry (their other dog) from stealing Mooses raw hide from him. Keep in mind, Master never touched Moose, but instead was stepping OVER him, and suddenly he just lashes out at Master, trying to bite at his feet and ankles. Master tries pushing Moose away from him, and in the process, Moose latched onto Master's hand and was shaking His hand violently, as if he were trying to tear His hand right off His arm. This is when Master's dad came in, and literally had to pry Moose off Master and kicked him across the room and locked him outside.

After I doctored up Master's hand, I guess Master and His dad briefly spoke in which Master was told that Moose was getting euthanized tomorrow afternoon. Basically His dad was just like "How many times do we have to keep getting bitten by this dog? I'm getting sick of it." Typically, he is a very calm and peaceful person, but as many times as everyone has been bit in this house, including myself, he is just getting tired of it. No one else will take this dog in, because of his history of biting, and he is slowly getting more and more aggressive over the months. His eye sight is getting bad, he can barely hear. The only other choice would be to put him in a shelter, but they'll end up putting him to sleep there anyways, cause he'll still be biting people and he's so old.

No one wants to do it, and it's understandable, but honestly, I think it is something that has to be done. I am sorry for Master's mother, who is taking it the worst. She's spent most of the evening crying, which is to be expected. 

Well, scratch that, it may be a few days before the dog gets put down. I just got word from Master a few moments ago...

Honestly.. this is going to sound really mean, but I'm kind of.. at peace with the idea. I feel bad for Master and His parents, but I feel no remorse for the dog. He bit my Master, completely unprovoked in any way, and he's tried biting me this week completely unprovoked as well. In fact, when he actually did bite me a few weeks ago, that was unprovoked as well.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again, that dog is a beast, and a monster. I don't really like the dog, and I probably never will. Is it sad that it has come to this? Very. It saddens me a little bit to know that by the end of this week, Moose will no longer be with us, but once everyone is over being sad, this place will be a lot calmer, and no one will have to live in fear of whether or not someone is going to get bitten today or not. 

Frankly, I'm sick of it, and I've been talking to Master lately of not coming over anymore until the dog were to pass away. I guess the good part is that I won't have to do that.. but... it's not really under the best circumstances. I know that Master's father is not happy about this. No one really wants this to happen, but honestly it's for the best. It's the only other option because they can't have Moose biting another family. As I said before, no one is really going to be willing to take a vicious dog into their home, knowing he is prone to biting, now, completely unprovoked. There is really no other option...

I don't know, though. I'm really indifferent to the situation. I'll probably cry when he goes, but not because he is going, but because Master and His parents will be hurting, and I hate seeing the people I love hurt.

I really don't know when it's going to happen... but the chances of him being gone before the week is up is very high. It's sad to say, but I'm kind of hopeful. I'm sure some of my readers will be pissed with me, saying I'm cruel, but honestly, after seeing what I've seen, dealing with the emotional stress, and fear of getting bitten every single day. Trust me, it wears a person down after a while, and things just get uglier. This really is the best for all of us, including the dog.


Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Ramblings and Other Thoughts

The other day, Master and I were talking about life in general, and what we were going to do for our future. For once the talk of babies and marriage didn't come up, which was actually a load off my chest even though I'm typically the one who brings it up first. Instead we spoke of our plans for an apartment, me getting my drivers license, saving up for a car of my own, and things in that general area.

Something else was brought up in the midst, and that was bringing one of my cousin's, who is two years younger than me, into the picture. Kyle and I have always gotten along since we were kids, and we might as well be brother and sister. It's a well known fact that he wants to be a chef, and where he is living right now, not only will he not be able to do that, but his mother sure as hell is not helping him out in any way shape or form. (I love my family, but seriously, they have lots of problems that I just REALLY do not need or want to get into). 

So the thought was, once Master and I get our bearings straight, and get a little more stable, we could bring Kyle to live with us, help him get into school here in town, get his GED, and hopefully help him get up on his feet and do what he wants to do. Plenty of places around here are hiring chefs and cooks, so its definitely a way to get his foot in the door. The plan would be to help him out till he can get on his feet, then when he is ready and saved up enough money, get him his license, his own car, and then his own apartment. Till then, we'll be sharing with him. Which is fine by me. 

I really don't know how this is going to work out, and I know I'm nutty for wanting to do this, but he is family, I really care about him, and no one else is going to help him out, so why not someone who he knows, trusts, loves, and can be comfortable being himself around?

If that does happen though, it won't be for at least another year and a half, and at most another after Master and I get a place of our own, so we have plenty of time to talk to Kyle about this, save up money, and think of ways to make this work. My only worry is our M/s and kinky lifestyle. 

I know it has not really been discussed with Kyle, but I'm pretty sure he has caught on that Master and I are living this type of lifestyle, and lets be honest here, Kyle is no idiot. We don't really try to hide it around Him, because after all, He's barely younger than us (18) and two, he is someone we can trust. Out of all the blabber mouths I have in my family, Kyle has always been good at keeping secrets, so he is no threat to us. 

My main concern is I know Master and I planned on holding a few events at our place once we got a place, but nothing too rambunctious. Just a small get together with other lifestyler's we know and trust. I just wouldn't want my cousin feeling left out, but also, I don't want him feeling.. awkward, nor our friends. So I really do not know. I know we'd try to get him a separate room so he can have his computer and battle station in there, so if he wanted privacy and to stay away from us, he has a safe place to be.

Still lots of thinking to do there. We'll figure something out. To me family always comes first, and if Master and I can help him get his life together and make a good future for himself, I'm willing to sacrifice time doing kinky things just to help him out.

Funny enough, Master was the one who mentioned bringing Kyle to live with us. If that tells you anything. *smiles* They really do get along a lot. As they say, we'll worry about crossing that bridge once we get there.

Other things that have been on my mind are finding ways for more time with Master. I get to see Him every day, yes, but with both of us in school now, and having loads of homework to do, there is little to no time for intimacy anymore. We're always trying to sneak "quick ones" in when His parents step out of the house for a few minutes, or when we think His parents won't come upstairs for a while. It's... annoying. 

Granted, I'm thankful that I do get time to be with Him, but I miss when we used to be able to have passionate sex without the worry of someone barging in at any given moment. To put a good insight on things, even though His mom was right down the hall last night in her bedroom, with the door shut, it was VERY tempting to just jump Him on the spot. (Would not have turn out well, considering I'm pretty... erm.. vocal.. Yeah, that's one way to put it). 

Oh well. It won't be too long now. Right? Trying to keep up faith and hope here. 

I guess the last thing I want to cover is what happened the other night with Angel. To be honest, I thought about it all day yesterday, trying really hard to wrap around my head around it. It was like waking up from a dream, but it actually happened. 

The feelings I have for her are.. interesting. Nothing bad, but interesting. I can honestly say I love her, but not in the same way I love my Master. I'm honestly afraid she is going to read this and think I'm nutty or something. lol I mean it's true I think about her, and I care about her. I guess the thing I am trying to say is that no matter what happens, I'll always respect her and take her as she is. No matter what happens. 

She is a very beautiful person, whom I enjoy being around, and I can only hope that from here on out we'll always be friends, even if this thing between us doesn't necessarily work out. I keep repeating myself.. I know....

I just hope she realizes she could never push me too far, and that I'll never be weirded out by anything she says and does. I care about her too much for that too happen. At any rate, it was just nice to see her again, and to be able to hug her, hold her and kiss her again. ^.^;; *blush*.

I find it amazing that Master is so open to this. I would have never thought that this would ever be going on. Haha. I figured Master would be like me, and want to keep Him to myself. I feel almost like a hypocrite, because if He wanted to be with someone else, I'd have a hard time with it. Especially if it was another female. Considering Master is straight, He'd never go for another guy, if we ever did decide to bring in another slave/submissive, it would be a woman. 

Granted, I don't think that would ever happen, but I'm just saying.. I feel selfish. I'm trying really hard to change my views, because if Master can share me, then I should be able to do the same, you know? Granted, I'm a LOT better about it, and sometimes the thought of Master kissing another woman in front of me would be a bit arousing, but I know those feelings of bitterness would still be there. I've come a long way.

I know that will probably never happen, but in case it does, I'm trying REALLY hard to prepare myself. If I can love multiple people, and it be okay with Master, then I feel it should go both ways.

Just my thoughts. 

For those who are reading, do you have any advice and tips on getting over something like that? What would you do in my situation?

Any feed back would be nice.


Monday, November 21, 2011

What A Night!

Yesterday evening, Master and I got to go over to Angel and Panda's place for the first time in a while. Upon arriving there, we were greeted at the door by Angel, who gave me a nice warm hug. It was so nice to see her and Panda again. I tried giving Panda a hug, but He denied me (like a jerk! lol j/k) so I just sat with Master. 

Not too long after getting there, we sat down and played this game called Arkham Horror, which was pretty interesting. (No, it had nothing to do with Batman). Basically, portals would open up and monsters would come out of these portals. Then we'd have to try to fight them and not lose our health and sanity in the process. Needless to say, I ended up in the hospital twice. 

We played that for what felt like 30 minutes, but really was almost two hours (never got to finish it), and then the Masters went out and got all of us some food. While they were out, Angel joined me on the couch and we just sat there and talked about random things, like usual, and before we knew it, our Master's were back. We watched an episode of It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia while we ate.

So time went by, we tried getting back into the game after eating, and that's when we all decided that it was just time to quit the game. 

Here we are, just sitting there in the living room together, when suddenly it felt like a huge intervention for Angel and myself. Literally it was the Masters vs. the slaves. (The heck just happened?) They were talking about how we do not make the first moves and they were kind of tired of us going home after seeing one another saying things like 'You know... I really wish I would have kissed her more." or "I really wish I just would have snuggled with her more." Yeah... you get the drift. 

(For those who are newly reading, Angel and I are kind of play partners, meets with friends with benefits, meets cuddle buddies, meets... well.. hell I still don't know~! We are just "us" and we like one another more than friends, but we're best friends too.) 

Next thing we know we're being told to make out by our Masters' and we're both sitting on the couch, apart from one another, blushing and protesting that we shouldn't just yet cause we're feeling pressured. Then Master is shoving me closer to Angel on the couch, and Panda is telling her to move closer to me. so now that we're practically sitting on each other's laps, we're still protesting.

Eventually we agreed that we'd go into the bedroom, and the Master's stayed out in the living room area so we could do our thing in private. Of course, I knew once we got in there, they;;d be sneaking down the hallway. Sure enough I put my ear to the door and I heard their light footsteps. I looked at Angel and whispered (loudly) that they were outside the door. 

We opened the door and sure enough I saw Master with His back against the wall, and I knew Panda was on the opposite wall. We finally got them to go away. 

What happened next was nice, but being as nervous as I was, I didn't get to quite enjoy it to the full extent I know I would have if I weren't so freaking nervous. (Seriously.. I DO NOT do well under pressure. I get all weird, nervous, and stuff). It was a sweet kiss, longer than the usual pecks that we typically shared. Her lips were so soft and delicate. *stupid grin* I felt like I was fumbling around, perhaps I was, or was not, but I did enjoy kissing her longer than a split second for once. Would have been nice to have not been so pressured to do it, as I like to take my time on these things, but I understand where the Master's were coming from. 

They felt that we weren't going to do it for fear of either offending one another or our Master's, so as our Master's, they felt it was time to give that extra push. 

Regardless, I enjoyed the outcome.

Again, after it was all done and over with, we sat on the bed and just talked for a bit, and then finally our Master's came in to see what we were up to. Panda ended up handing me a crop to use on Angel, and I swatted at her butt a few times before Panda asked me to turn around. Pretty sure He was checking to see if she was wet, but I turned around anyways, out of respect for them.

I got to swat at her a few more times with that crop, and a smaller one, then Panda handed me what is known at the "Beatin' stick". Considering I have NEVER messed with this item before, or anything like it, I went out to the kitchen where I could test it on my own hand to see what it felt like to swing it. I knew this thing hurt, because my Master got to use it on me earlier in the evening. He barely swung it and it even hurt me. My intent was not to do harm. 

When I came back to the room they were all applauding me, saying it was good I did that. Kind of made me blush, but I was proud of myself, none-the-less. After toying with it some more, I decided I didn't want to use it on her. I didn't know the proper way to swing it and for fear of doing some damage, I kindly handed it back to Panda and He took the time to use it on her instead. XD

They showed us this stuff called "Horny Honey" (I still giggle hearing that. It just sounds cute and funny to me). It was supposed to be an arousal cream. They let Master put some on my left nipple. Nothing happened. They thought maybe there wasn't enough put on me, so Master rubbed in some more.

Still nothing.

Now, I don't remember who brought it up, but one of the two said something about cinnamon oil. I shrugged and said "Okay." to which Panda and Angel were kind of like "You're being a little too nonchalant about this." So off went my shirt and bra and I was on my back on this mini table they had. They diluted the cinnamon oil with a carrier oil and then it was applied to my chest. 

I waited and waited for something to happen. Nothing. A ceiling fan was going above me, and still nothing. Eventually I felt a warm tingle, but that was it. The look on everyone's faces was priceless, but I sincerely felt nothing but the warm tingles it gave me. So then it was suggested to give a drop of pure cinnamon oil. I said "Okay" again and let them do what they had to. It was a little warmer this time, but still, not a burning sensation like I was supposed to feel. (I'm tempted to go to the cooking isle of a grocery store and buy that cinnamon oil and see if THAT does the trick). Everyone else who got in contact with it had red fingers, they felt burning sensations, and even Panda's eyes were watering. Me? Perfectly fine. I tasted cinnamon for the rest of the night, but no burning sensation in my eyes either. 

Also, since I know Angel will be reading this later, Still no marks and still no irritations. Sorry. ^.^;

So I was dubbed a freak of nature (nothing new! LOL) and we moved on to something I've always wanted to try. FIRE PLAY~!!!

This was just so freaking cool. Panda rubbed rubbing alcohol on my back, and of course lit the area on fire, and the sensation was just off the charts. It felt really warm and just.. it's just one of those things you'd have to experience on your own. Trust me, it's awesome. Angel isn't too into fire play, so she sat that one out, but next came the wax, and she whole heartedly jumped right in. 

I watched as Panda dripped hot wax all down her back, and she was just so beautiful to watch. It was pretty fun, but next was my turn again, and they got out the green candle. Since it's darker than the white one they used on Angel, the wax was going to be hotter, and for me, the hotter, the better. The same was done to me, and I melted as soon as the wax touched me. Talked about being in my happy place.

So after all the wax was peeled off of me by the same knife that Panda peeled the wax off Angel with, we all just kind of sat around. Eventually, Angel and I were put to the test again by our Masters. (They are REALLY enjoying ganging up on us too much. lol) and I was supposed to suck on one of Angel's nipples while playing with the other one.

At first, Angel was facing away from me, protesting. Pretty sure she was blushing like mad too, and resisted for several ongoing minutes. eventually, she broke down, took her shirt back off and laid out in front of me. Before I even touched her, I made sure she was okay with it. I know Panda was saying yes, but I wanted to hear it from her. She agreed to it, and I put my lips to her left nipple. I didn't suck on her for too long, but I did as I was told to do to her, and even though it seemed like she was enjoying it, I could tell she was slightly uncomfortable and holding back. So after about a minute or so of toying with her, I let up and told her that was enough for tonight. 

Not too long afterwards, we all said our "goodbyes" and Angel and I got to share one last kiss of the night. I finally got that hug from Panda, and then we left.

So yeah, still glowing, and stuffs... ^.^

Last night was just awesome, and could not have gone any better, despite any awkwardness. ^.^;;;

Also, if you'd like to see her side of the story, here is Part 1 of her side. Also, Part 2.


Saturday, November 19, 2011

Sensual Massage

As I stated yesterday, while Master and I were out for our anniversary we stopped at a book store in the mall and I got a book on erotic massages. Master has always loved getting massages from me, and for someone who really never had any "training" on it, but picked up merely from paying attention to how my friend gave one to me, I learned real quick how to give a relaxing massage that could work down deep in the muscles.

Feeling it was time for a new twist on things, I bought this book for us, to learn how to do different types of massages. Preferably sensual and erotic ones. So this afternoon after I got off work (which I got out an hour early cause we were over-staffed!) I sat down and briefly read up on the first chapter. Sensual Massage. For the most part it, it was something I've always done, but I noticed one thing that I never really thought about, and that was "gliding." Letting one's fingers gently glide across their lover's body, and applying light pressure and "kneading." 

Most of the time I apply a slight amount of pressure, mainly to work out the knots that Masters' back so easily gets. This time, I focused on this gliding technique, and I witnessed something amazing. In a matter of mere seconds, Master was like putty in my hands. He melted right into the bed and I'm fairly certain that in a few short minutes He had fallen asleep on the spot. 

After working on His back, shoulders and neck for about a half an hour, I woke Him up and got Him to steady Himself to a sitting position. This is when I tried something else that I had never tried before. Giving Him a facial and head massage. (Giggity). 

Now, I know this sounds sexual, but it really wasn't. It was legit massaging His face, forehead, cheeks, chin, nose, and his scalp. As if He weren't a pile of Master goo already, that certainly did the trick. I was very gentle, and even caressed His face a bit, and just gently rubbed and scratched at His scalp. Once I was done, not only was Master fully relaxed and allowed to lay on His back, but I noticed He was rock hard. 

A grin crept on my face when I noticed, but I really payed no mind to it and headed to the restroom. It was when I was walking that I noticed something off about me. Sure enough I too was aroused, and I had even soaked through my panties as well. I guess there is a first for everything. 

I sat and thought about it, though, and for another first I too was extremely relaxed, as if I had been the one getting a massage. It made sense to me, though, as I had literally put what bit of energy I had left in me to do it. And by energy, I mean legit energy, not will power. Energy ebbs and flows just the like ocean, and it is very much transferable if one knows how to do it, and do it right. We can give energy just the same as we can take it, and what I did was simply a matter of give and take. Kind of like a current. With contact, I was able to channel His energy into me, and give me energy to Him, if that makes any sense. 

At any rate, after realizing it, I just couldn' help be feel highly satisfied. Not only had our very first session of this new book go right, but it went better than expected. Almost perfect, I'd dare say.

What a pleasing evening.


Friday, November 18, 2011

3 Wonderful Years With Master

Today marks the day when Master and I first got together three years ago. We met in high school and started out as friends that eventually turned into best friends, then bf/gf, and now here we are as Master and slave. Quite the transformation, I'd say. The journey we've made so far has not been an easy one, but as with most couples, our trials and hard-ships has brought us that much closer, and for once in my life, I actually believe in a soul mate. 

Serving my Master is more than a release for me. It is devotion, sincere, trust, and most of all, love. What we have is something special to us, and it is a very beautiful thing. Sometimes I wonder how we ever got to this point, but I've long since decided that there is no reason questioning this, as Master was God's gift to me. I'm certain God sent Master my way because he knew I needed someone as special, stable and wonderful as Him in my life.

These last three years have been mostly good for us, and I'm thankful that Master has stuck it out with me for as long as He has. Honestly, He is the one thing that keeps me sane 95% of the time. Needless to say, I'm very thankful.

On to today though, we got to enjoy each other's bodies through some wonderful love making, and it was just a very beautiful moment between us. Afterwards, we headed to Logan's where we got a nice dinner and I was treated to a rare steak with some jumbo shrimp. (It was AWESOME). We ended up heading to the mall after a failed attempt to find anything at Best Buy. Our first stop was Books A Million, where Borders used to be, and I sought out an interesting find while we were in the sex section of the store. 

Check it!

Awww yeah~!!
It has everything from how to make the right massage oils, down to massages during sex! Tantric massages... I skimmed through it a little bit ago, and it looks amazing! It even teaches you how to massage with your mouth. Cause giving oral has a technique, you know? And for everything it mentions, there is a type for both men and women. This is going to be awesome. 

I know what I'm going to be reading for the next few weeks and studying how to do! ;D Master seems enthused by it as well, so it seems like something we can both get into and enjoy at the same time. ^.^

Tomorrow, I'm going to bake Master some sugar cookies after I get off work, and who knows what else we'll be getting into this weekend. (hopefully some of that massaging!) 

Things are about to get real interesting for us soon. ^.^


Thursday, November 17, 2011

Virtual Blogger Award?! O_O

Wow so uh.. this was highly unexpected! I really have no idea what to say, other than giving a huge "Thank you" to Master Dreams's precious treasure and Bre for nominating me as well. 

I know it may sound silly, but I kind of needed this, just as a spirit uplifter because lately I've been having a bad streak. NONE OF THAT NOW, cause it's time for celebration. ^.^ 

At any rate, thank you ladies so much for nominating me. It's more than appreciated and it was definitely a wonderful surprise. Haha. Definitely made my day. <3

Now, on to what I'm supposed to do next, which is list 7 things about me, and nominate 15 other bloggers for this award as well. So here we go~!

1. Music is my passion. Every time I feel things are not going right, or if I just need to occupy my time, 99.99% of the time I resort to music of some sort. I love how raw and full of emotion I feel when I am in tune with the music I'm listening to, and especially when I sing along. It is the one time I feel most free. I mainly listen to electronica, techno, rock, indie rock, metal, German metal, j-pop, j-rock, k-pop, and industrial.

2. Dragon's Blood is my favorite scent of incense. If I could ever find it anywhere, I'd buy it in bulk because I know I'd run out in a heart beat. Seriously, I'd give anything to have some more at this point. (If anyone knows where I can get my hands on some, PLEASE TELL ME~!!!!) lol

3. I'd like to think of myself as an artist of some type. As I mentioned before, music is my thing, so on occasion I will actually sit down and try to make music and lyrics. Granted, that doesn't always work out, but I still try. I also LOVE to draw, and when ever I get the chance, I will sit and draw for hours on end. It's a fantastic release, and typically I am very proud of myself when I've finished.

4. I'm so spastic that I'm shocked I haven't drove most of my friends, family members, and Master crazy at this point. Most of the time I try to remain calm and collective, but I will have moments when I just can't help bursting out into something random on the spot. I applaud my fellow friends for being so patient with me. I know it gets annoying from time to time. ^.^;;

5. I don't know if this is obvious or not, but at times I really wish I were a cat. Cats have the simple life, and I mean really, who DOESN'T want to cuddle a cat every day/night? If I were a cat... endless lovin's~!!!!!!!!! Plus I could get away with me "meowing" every so often without getting stares. Hahaha~!

6. Believe it or not, I speak Japanese. I used to speak it fluently, but I didn't really have anyone to talk to in Japanese with, so I've gotten rusty. Lately, though, I've been trying to brush back up on that. I miss speaking it fluently and hope to get back up there with that. Some day, I'll be at that point again... 

7. While I know I don't always come off as this, I LOVE my video games. I play anything from WoW to Dead Space, to Minecraft and Maple Story. Honestly, I'll play just about every game once, that is if they are not games based on wars. Okay.. scratch that, I have played the Fall Out games, even though I know they are more about nuclear waste lands, they do have a bit of war to them. My favorite old school games include, you guessed it, Mario and Sonic The Hedgehog. Some other classics include Legend of Zelda, Space Invaders, Mortal Kombat and Pac-Man. Yeah~ that's the good stuff. Mmmph~!

Okay so that was probably not the most interesting thing I've written about myself, but it's better than nothing! Haha

Now! On to my nominations. This is going to be tricky... I don't know if I can name off 15, but I'll try to name as many as possible.

1. I know this fine young woman has already been nominated, and I really have no idea how many times, but I really have to point her out. Bre from Owned, Collared, Loved. Not because she is my friend, but because this woman is an inspiration to me. She and I have only known each other for a couple of years, but she is truly someone I look up to. I love everything about her, and I love that she is so strong and over comes everything from her fears, to her hardest struggles. I mean really, off the charts amazing. Check out her journey and the progress she's made. I'm very proud of her and her accomplishments.

2. Emma from Ramblings of a kajira. Seriously, I sometimes wonder if she is Super Woman in disguise cause she literally does everything. She is another strong woman I know of, and I simply love reading what she has to say every day. I mean.. there is never a dull moment in this woman's life. At least it doesn't seem like it.

3. My Bottom Smarts I don't quite know her name, and I just started reading her posts about a month ago, but she has some really interesting things to say. Definitely someone to check out.

4. Alley from Hyperbole and A Half This girl is just straight up all kinds of funny. I don't personally know her either, but I do know that when she makes a post, it's going to make me laugh and bring a smile to my day. Some of my readers already probably know of her, but if you don't, start reading! You will not be disappointed. Trust me!

5. Adam Taylor from Taylor Made If you are someone who loves reading video game reviews and hearing about the latest games, then this is your guy right here. He too is a pretty cool guy, and someone who I enjoy reading as well. Then again, I'm a nerd and I love my video games.

6. Certari from Diary of Sublimation Another cool cat that I really enjoy. She is interesting and has an odd sense of humor that I absolutely adore. She falls into the category "strong woman" and is another inspiration in and of herself.

7. Casey from Dating A Transboy This girl is the epitome of "sugar, sunshine, bubbles, and everything nice." Truly a sweetie, and also very admirable. As you guessed from the blog title, she is dating a Transboy. She is doing something that most people not only do not think of ever doing, but usually don't stick through it. Her bf (who was originally a girl) is currently finding themselves out and realizing that she is a boy trapped in a girls body. Not only is it interesting to hear from Casey's point of view, but it is a very heart touching read that she is sticking it out for the one she loves. I love this couple so freaking much.

8. Leo from Unaddressed Letters. She too is another sweetheart and I think she is outright adorable. She doesn't right all that much, but when she does, she has this demeanor of just making you want to squeeze and hug her. Love her to death.

I know there were others I have not mentioned, and I'm sorry for that. It is nothing personal, and I still love ya. I hope everyone enjoys reading these people's stories as much as I do.

Thank you all again very much for your support, and thank you to my readers and followers for just taking the time out of you day to read up on me and listening to what I have to say.

This was truly awesome. Thank you all!!!


Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Just An Update On The Past Week

Well in the past week, Moose finally bit me. The problem dog I spoke of not too long ago. I was VERY lucky I was wearing my shoes when it happened because the little bastard bit through my jeans and my shoe. So yay for having teeth holes in my jeans, but in my shoes as well. On top of that, for some reason he just didn't want to let go, and Master had to shove him off of me with his foot, and the dog was latched on so hard to me, that he literally did a flip across the room when Master finally got him pried off of me. If I hadn't had my shoes on, I'd probably have puncture wounds on my foot right about now, and I know my toes would be screwed up too.

Thank god for shoes and for Master.

Ironically enough, when he bit me, I was actually looking around for him in hopes I wouldn't step on him and have that exact problem. In the process, I'm not sure if I kicked him by accident (honestly, I never once felt my foot collide with him) and in a split second, everything went from perfectly fine to "HOLY SHIT! I have a dog trying to literally tear my foot off!!!" As I said before, Master had to pry him off of me, because me trying to shake that wretched beast loose was not working. 

That was last Friday, so nearly a week ago.

Moving along, though, I got my hair cut that same night, and got it thinned. I think it looks pretty good. Tomorrow, a friend of mine, DarkestAngel, is going to be re-dying my hair red, so yay for that. The other night I got to talk to my father about that bad incident nearly a month ago, and we've settled our differences. There was an argument between my mother and myself that same night before I got to talk to my dad, so that was pleasant. 

As far as school goes, I've been up to my ears in papers and essays with my English class, and I'm more than happy that I only have a couple weeks left in there before it's all over. Seriously... 13 papers in a 11 week quarter and a research paper to be the cherry on top. What is so nutty about this is that she isn't sure she's giving us enough to do! Trust me.. she's given us MORE than enough. And if you do the math correctly, yes, that is one essay per week, and one week we actually had to turn in TWO essays on the same day. 

Can. Not. Wait. To. Get. Out. Of. There.....

Lately things just have not been going right, but I'm hoping that when Friday hits, everything in the balance will be restored back to normal. After all, Friday is November the 18th which will be my 3 year anniversary with Master. So I'm REALLY hoping this weekend will go as well as expected and we'll be able to put the bullshit that has happened lately behind. 

Correction, I'm hoping I can put MY bullshit behind. 

Yesterday, I was really upset over some things that happened with my mom and not even five minutes after walking in the door at Master's place, I ended up having a full blown panic attack, topped with hyperventilation. I seriously think it freaking Him out, because if memory serves me right, that's the first time Master has ever witnessed me having a panic attack. (I used to have them all the time, and anxiety attacks too).


There is a silver lining somewhere, at the point. So I'm just trying REALLY hard to keep my head held high and keep up hope. I've been praying my ass off to God that he'll deliver something good my way. So yeah. I'm about ready to drop dead at this point. Include the little "x's" for eyes and the tongue sticking out. Haha..

I feel relaxation is in order for me this evening.


Tuesday, November 15, 2011

I'm Still Learning and Growing

And I will be till the day I die. 

It's a known fact that we, as people, do not know everything the world has to give us, and we never will. It is one thing, though, to own up to that and realize that achieving "ultimate knowledge" is highly impossible. I am not perfect, nor do I proclaim to be. I am my own imperfect mess, and I am just fine with that. 

There always is, and always will be, room for improvement, and room to take in more knowledge. 

At this point, all I have to say is that I may say and do things that will piss off my family and friends. I may feel certain ways, and think certain things that they do not, and never will, agree with me on. That is fine. I can only hope that my friends can still love me for who and what I am, just as I love them for who and what they are. We all have our differences, and we all have moments where we will clash. 

I can only hope and pray that they realize I am still learning, just as they are, and I am still trying to figure things out in my life. I have flaws just like everyone else, but the difference is that I am trying to fix some of these flaws so I can be the best person I can be. 

I may not get it done the right way this moment, but eventually, I will figure it out, and I will be a better person for it. All I ask of my friends and family is that they be patient with me. I'm trying really hard to better myself, and to be the grown mature young woman I know I can be. 


Punishing Your Children

Alright, so here I was on youtube,  just browsing some videos when I came across a jewel among treasures. It was a video on what a girls opinion was on bare bottom spanking your children. Now, everyone is entitled to their own opinions, but some of the things she says just made me want to not only smack her, but bang my head on my desk.

She goes on saying that it's wrong, and she gives reasons to why she feels it's wrong. Some of them, I can kind of understand (kind of) but for the most part, I felt like I was listening to an ill formed person speak about something they they really had no idea what they were talking about. 

At one point, she mentions that the human butt is part of our genitalia. WHOA! STOP RIGHT THERE! Rewind that bitch and play it again. The fuck did you just say? I'm sorry... but I gotta call this out. Did this girl ever pay ANY attention to sex education at all while she was in school? Did anyone ever go over the reproductive systems with this girl? Cause somewhere along the way, she has seemed to have missed something. 

Okay, so that was pretty freaking stupid, lets keep watching. We then hear her say that getting spanked on the bare bottom hurts. Uh.. DUH~! It's supposed to hurt! That is the point of getting spanked as a kid! To teach you that if you do something that the parent considers "bad", it results in pain. We all know kids don't like pain, so in hopes of spanking them, we teach them not to do something completely off the charts "wrong".

Now there was one last major thing she mentioned, that I noticed, and I can actually understand this better than most people think. She said that her being spanked bare bottomed kind of messed her up. Alright. I understand this. As they say "What works for one person, may not work for another." And in this case, I don't think it worked out well for her. Some people get spanked as kids, and they grow up just fine, while other will have the same treatment, but they grow up to feeling semi-neglected, or maybe betrayed. 

The point is, it doesn't work on them well. I can understand that sort of thing mentally scarring a kid. We are all wired differently, and some people can't take physical correction like others can. Just like for me, grounding me was the least effective thing in the world. I was stubborn, and rebelled against being grounded. 

So in her defense, I understand that, and honestly that is possibly the only thing I don't find stupid about this video. To me, that is a reasonable explanation and that is something that people can and do go through. 

As a child, I got physically corrected more times than I did verbally or got grounded. Granted that wasn't much as I tried my best to be as good of a kid as one could possibly do. I have gotten spanked on the bottom, bare. I've had a belt and a switch taken to me as well. (No wonder I like pain now. Lol j/k) and I feel I've turned out just fine.

This is my life, personally though. Would I spank my kids bare bottom? If it warranted it, yes. I for one, do not find it to be a form of perversion, but then again, I'm also not a pedophile either. That sort of thing doesn't get me off now, and it will NEVER get me off. 

In my opinion, punishment is necessary to an extent, and that extent is to try to teach the child how to behave and how to keep them in line. Going past that, yes, we seem to have a problem. As long as I am not bruising my kid, and if they have so much as a red mark on them and that's it, then I feel I have not pushed too far, and I feel that the deed was done correctly. 

The way I see it, is if I was able to be punished like that as a kid myself, then my children are not going to be "too good" to be punished when they do something wrong too. 

To any of my readers, what are your feelings on punishment with a/your child? what do you think about this girls' opinion on this subject? Do you think she is right, wrong? Why?

Give me some of your opinions. 

Thanks for reading. 


Monday, November 14, 2011

"Honey, I'm Pregnant."

Before anyone freaks out, no I'm not really pregnant, but I've been having these series of dreams where I always end up pregnant with a boy and a girl. (not at the same time). The scenarios are almost always different, but I always end up having a girl first, then a boy. 

Now, I know I really want kids some day, and sometimes my ovaries do scream for kids, but I also know that I am not nearly ready enough to start popping them out... My question is, why? Why do I keep having these dreams. They are so frequent that I'm pretty certain to have this dream at least once a week. 

I dunno... 

Thursday, November 10, 2011

From Ashes To A Phoenix

No, this is not a book (at least I don't think it is!) but this is something I truly feel about myself and how my life is turning out.

Basically, I started off my life small (not cause I was little), but as I grew older I have overcome obstacles galore, dealt with hard times all around, and somehow, I'm still coming out okay. Even better, I have blossomed into this beautiful young woman, who I never thought I would be.

Somehow, through all the chaos that has been involved in my life, I have burst through those ashes of my past life and became this wonderful thing. This astounding creature. I'm so proud of myself, and the decisions I have made. Even though times were rough, I'm pretty thankful I had to endure them. The fact that I survived means that I am a strong person, that I can overcome whatever life throws my way, and that I will come out stronger than before.

After all, if it weren't for those things, I wouldn't be who I am today. So in a way, I am thankful that I had to go through it all. Yes, it hurt an awful lot, and I spent months worrying and crying over it, but now that most of that is over, I can truly be happy with how everything turned out. Even better, if some of those things didn't happen, such as the divorce of my biological parents, I would have never met the love of my life, and I would have never met some of the most amazing friends that I have as well.

It's a known fact that times get rough, but stick through it. Anyone can make it out, so long as they keep faith, hold their heads high, and just keep going forward. For those of my followers that are reading this, know that if I can make it through a divorce, molestation, psychological abuse, and heartbreaks, so can you.

I wish to challenge my readers and ask them "Are you happy with who you have become?" Every one of you have strengths within you, and maybe you have not unlocked them yet, but know that you can, and you are strong. Each day we are alive is worth rejoicing over, because God has granted us this day to live on. We are blessed in our own ways.

So I challenge my readers again. Think about what has happened, the good and the bad, and try to think of how it has effected you in positive ways. Take the negative in your life, and flip it into something positive. Everyone deserves to be happy. 

I love you all.


Friday, November 4, 2011

"Do You Wish To Indulge?"

These are the words that will probably forever resonate within my mind till the day I die....

What started as a normal day for Master and I, ended up not only being one of the best nights of my life, but possibly, one of the best things that has ever happened to me. 

We wen't out to dinner around 6 this evening, and Master let me have my favorite food, rare steak with roasted vegetables. Later on we decided to head out to The Lions Den where we found this pretty nifty looking riding crop, that seemed sturdy enough to handle the beatings I so love to take. We also bought a sexy outfit, and a little bondage game. 

After heading back to Master's place, we decided to head up stairs to try out our new toys. The crop feels nice and has just the right amount of sting that I love. We decided to name her Victoria. (Silly, I know, but I love it). ^.^ We also tried out the little game we bought, which had fifty cards of "naughty, kinky scenarios" on each of them.

At first.. it started off a little.. well... It didn't go well, but eventually it let to what became the best fucking sex I have EVER had in my life. Seriously.. I don't think anything is going to hold a candle to this evening for a LONG~ time!

Master read a card to Himself, and had this devilish grin on His face, and immediately, I knew something was about to go down. He had my blindfold myself, and told me to prop myself against the head board of the bed, and spread my legs for Him. He then told me to start masturbating in front of Him.

Alright... simple enough. I had done this before, so I was easy to comply and go along with it. I began rubbing my clit gently. Slow, at first. Taking my time. Next thing I know, Master is asking me to describe how I am feeling. (Guys.. sorry if my grammar and words seem off. I'm still trying to wrap my head around this. You have no idea how mind blowing this was). So I began telling Him how I felt. How I noticed my muscles were already clenching in my legs, and I could feel the inside of my cunt starting to pulsate as I became wetter from the stimulation. 

This went on for a while, and suddenly.. Master said something that He has never said to me before, and somehow... it was the perfect trigger phrase. I heard Him in front of me, His voice seemingly closer. "Do you wish to indulge?" His voice was deep, and enticing. Almost hypnotic with the way He said it. All I could mutter was an incoherent "Uh.. huh?" 

"I said, do you wish to indulge?"

"I- I have no idea why you are saying this, but yes, Master...~!"

"Then indulge!"

His voice was so full of dominance, and His command hit the spot. Suddenly I was feeling closer than before. All because He said those words and the way He said them.

He told me to pay attention to my surroundings, and asked me if I noticed anything different, and almost instantly I realized that something was different. He was a lot closer, and I had just caught on. I also started noticing that His breath was hot on my dripping wet cunt, and each time He spoke, a puff of warm air hit me just right, and I started to squirm. My fingers started going faster around and on my clit, and again I heard...

"Do you wish to indulge?"

and again, I couldn't resist Him. My words were so spaced out between gasps of breath that I had to yell "Yes! yes, Master, I do!"


This sent me into a frenzy. I was frantically stimulating myself, praying for a release, but nothing came. No matter how hard I tried, I just could not cum. Something was missing, but what was it? And as hard as I was trying, next came the stream of tears, but it was not from frustration. In fact, I have no idea why I was crying. I just was, and it felt so good to be so raw like that in front of Him.

"Do you need something, Anastassia?"

"Yes Master. I need your cock!"

"Oh? You do? You what to say..."

It was like I could feel Him smirking beneath my blinded eyes. Without hesitation I began begging, telling Him I needed His cock to cum for Him.

"You need my cock? It's the only way for you to cum, isn't it, Anastassia?"

"Yes, Master!!! Yes!!"

"Then you know what's next, right?" He said as His cock entered into me with diligent ease.

"It's time to cum, Anastassia?" I questioned, as these were the words He used when He wanted me to cum.

"It's time to cum, Anastassia."

That voice... that sweet dominant voice He used while thrusting into me. It was the key, and just as it had started, it ended with a huge finale that sent me into a writhing cumming pile of goo under Him. What was originally so hard for me to do this whole, instantly became easier once He commanded me to cum with His hard cock deep within me. 

I remember crying out louder than I ever had before, and literally crying at the same time. My body arched beneath His, and trembled with the most powerful release I have ever experienced. He stopped momentarily, to hold me and calm me down. I was sobbing. Sheer pleasure had me in it's grip, and only He could get it to let go.... and He did. 

Usually, I would be able to go on, and rock my hips with His, coaxing Him to cum, but instead, I couldn't move as He used me till He was cumming as well.

This post does not, and never will, do justice for what actually happened here tonight.... I have never felt closer and more loved by a person than I do right now.

I seriously... my brain is numb... 

I just wanted to post this really quick before I lost my last bit of energy and passed out.

I have a feeling this weekend is going to be the best weekend of my life.

Lol... the cum stain in front of me is so huge... 

This is... just... Thank you Master.. You fucking drive me crazy, and I love you.

Goodnight all.

Totally spent....


Thursday, November 3, 2011

The Game

Tonight, Master took a break from His homework, briefly, to read the story I posted up only hours ago. I could tell by the grin on His face, and by the look in His eyes that He was definitely enjoying it. I snuggled myself up to Him and asked if He liked it, and He told me yes, and told  me everything he loved about the story. 

At first, I thought He was laughing at my story (yes, I can even be insecure about my writing) and when I said that, He too my hand and placed it on His lap, which made me realize that He was rock hard beneath His jeans. A blush came across my face and He told me not to worry, that He was loving every word of it all. He also told me that He thought it was sexy that I got so many things right. Things like the food I made in the story, and how I sucked Him off under the desk. Even down to the little details that I added, like what is to be our routine when I stay with Him at night, which is to rouse Him awake each morning with a blow job, to dressing Him in something nice and fancy.

I really don't know for sure, but I think this bit of excitement led to a game He had me play shortly after He read it. 

I had been wanting some bagel bites, and asked if He could go get them for me. He agreed to it, but when He came back up to the room, He told me that He wanted to play a game with me. 

It went a little something like this...

If I wanted the plate of bagel bites, I basically, had to earn it. Master was holding the plate, slightly above His head. He told me in order to earn it, I was to suck Him off. As I sucked Him off, He would start slowly lowering the plate down to the bed. If I stopped, for any reason, the plate would be rose back up to where He had it in the first place, and I would have to start all over.

Easy, right?


I grinned and agreed to this, and took His cock into my mouth, slowly twirling my tongue around the head, and gently sucking all the while. I then took Him a little more into my mouth, sliding my tongue down the bottom of His shaft, and licking back up, still sucking on His cock. I took Him in a little further, and my saliva had starting pooling in the back of my throat at this point. I paused for a split second so I could swallow it down and continue.

"Ah! Gotta start over now~." He taunted me.

I told Him I had to swallow and it's really hard to do that while sucking on Him at the same time. He said He understood, but raised the plate back up anyways.

Damn. Lets try this again.

So I went back to what I was doing, and suddenly the scene on American Dad came on where Stan Smith pretends to be possessed by the devil. Now.. lots of things.. I find humorous... but for some reason.. every single time I see or hear that scene, I lose it. And that is EXACTLY what happened. What once started off as a sincere, delicious blow job for Master, suddenly became what I can only imagine as painful, but in the sense of "oh man.. this can't be happening...." not actual pain.

With His cock still in my mouth, I began laughing hysterically, and started choking on His cock for all the wrong reasons. I ended p falling back on the bed in my fit of laughter, all the while apologizing to Him, saying things like "Oh~ my god! Hold on~" *gigggles* "I'm so sorry! I promise..." *giggles more* "I promise I'll get right back to it I just~!" *giggles harder* "I'm sorry!" 

I didn't see His initial reaction, but I have a feeling He rolled His eyes at me and grinned.

After recovering from my giggle fit, I went right back into it, almost as if nothing had happened, and before I knew it, the plate was at my side. Now.. at the beginning, He had told me that once the plate was fully on the bed, I could stop sucking Him off, and eat them, or I could keep sucking on Him. It was my choice....

Judging by how hungry I was, I figured I would head straight for the food once I had my chance.

Nope. Wrong again.

Even though I noticed the plate was against my thigh. I was so focused on Him at that moment, I just didn't even care about the food anymore. Now, my main objective was to get Him to cum, and I was determined to get that as well. (I guess I'm a little greedy, huh?) 

Eventually, I got that too with the use of my tongue, and coaxing Him to "cum all over His cum dumpster." and to "use me like the filthy whore I am." I had finally done this enough that He got to climax and cum all over my chest. 

It was nice. Master hasn't gotten to cum on me in a while, so it was definitely a treat for me too. I gotta say, I wish we played more "games" like this more often. It'd make for some interesting moments and stories.

*happy sigh*

I am one lucky slave.