Positive Reinforcement

If there is anything that I have learned since becoming a slave, is that a relationship like this takes a lot patience, communication, devotion, and love. There is one thing though that snapped me back into reality just a little bit ago, and gave me a feeling like no other. That feeling can not be describe as mere happiness, or joy, or even pride. It's much bigger than that to me, and words are so minuscule to even dare try to phrase it.


Today, I was assigned a task. A small task that really did not require much thought at all. I was to clean the area between Master's bed and the closet, then clean the bed. Simple as that. For some reason, though, I felt the need, or rather want, to take it up a notch. I did as I was told, and then I decided to make the bed, then to clean by the t.v. stand, and I even put away all of the DVD's, movies, and books into a storage tub that fits neatly underneath Master's bed. I even decided to plug up Master's PS3 controllers so they would be charged by the time He wanted to play His games next. I also rearranged a few other things in the room so that there is plenty of space to move around, and neither of us would be tripping over it. 


Most of that was stuff I decided to do on my own, without Him asking, and I have to admit, I was pretty proud of myself. 


After I finished, I patiently waited till He got off work before preparing myself for the final touch. I heard Him pull up to the house in the truck around 6 P.M. this evening, and quickly positioned myself in the Nadu position in the middle of the now clean floor. A smile crept to my face as I heard the door open and heard His voice from the first floor of the house. He always lets me know He is home by saying "Hello" or something similar.


As I heard His foot steps ascending the stairs, I felt my smile get bigger.


"Hey hon."


"Hi Master."


"Oh hello~" He said with a smile.


"It's nice coming home to this."


The conversation carried on with Him complimenting on how nice the room looked, and I mentioned that a few other things were different. He couldn't quite figure it out, so I reached under the bed to pull out the box that held his games, books, and movies.


"Remember you had a hard time finding a place to put all of this? Well that is no longer a problem."


The smile upon His face was nice to see, but what really made the moment was when He embraced me in His arms telling me that this was a good thing, and that I was a good girl. That right there was the best thing I have heard all day, and brought a certain warmness and joy into my heart. Even removing His shoes after a long day made me feel at "Home." That was when it hit me, almost like an epiphany of sorts...


Positive reinforcement is key. It's one thing to want to serve, and to be given orders, but it's another thing when the Master is pleased, and in return the slave is pleased because he/she is rewarded with something as simple as "You're a good girl/boy." I not only was happy with making Him happy, but it made me feel wonderful to know that my efforts were not in vain and that, most of all, I was appreciated. Appreciation strikes home more with me than anything, because I have never really felt appreciated in my life. I think Master knows this, so something like a "thank you" or a little praise goes a long way with me. 


I was just asked by Him a few minutes ago of what I wanted as a reward for what I have done for Him, but to be honest, I already feel as if I've received my "reward."


~*~Anastassia~*~

30-Day BDSM Challenge: Day 4 & 5

First off, I'm putting these two together cause I didn't get to do Day 4 yesterday due to some minor set backs. A friend of mine was hanging out with me, left her keys at home and her room mate didn't get some till about 10:30 last night. By that point I was way too tired to even fool with a computer.


Any early experiences that, in retrospect, hint at your kinks?


I will point back towards my last post about being tied up at the age of 13. I think that was a definite hint right there. I know I've always been a people pleaser too, especially to my past bf's, so that probably hinted at my submissive nature as well.

What was your first kinky sexual experience?  If you haven’t had one yet, talk about what you hope to have happen.


I know for a fact my first kinky sexual experience was definitely with Master. If I remember correctly, our first experience together was of wax play and a rape scene. >.> Yeah...


~*~Anastassia~*~

30-Day BDSM Challenge: Day 3

How did you discover you were kinky?


Oh man! I was really anticipating this one, and I'm pretty excited to talk about this particular moment! ^.^


When I first discovered I was kinky, I was about 12-13 years old. I remember my friend and I hanging out at my place one afternoon after school, and I had an odd thought come to mind. "Hey! I wonder if I can escape bondage in a certain amount of time!" So I asked my friend to tie my wrists to my bed posts with some scarfs as tight as she could and time me to get out of it!


It took me a few minutes, but I was finally free and we both really didn't think much of it. Just a little bit of fun. However, that evening, I couldn't stop thinking about it. The feeling of almost helplessness as I struggled from being bound and tied up. That night, I ended up masturbating to the thought of being like that, and having a guy suck on my nipples and torturing me. I never told anyone about it, and this is actually the first time I'm opening up about it.


For a couple of years I thought it was odd, but about age 15 my curiosity got the best of me and I started doing some research online. I wondered if these things and thoughts were normal. Before too long, I was looking at all these bondage sites and realizing that other people were like me. Other people loved rough sex, and other people wanted to do the same things I wanted to do. People were actually doing things I had been day dreaming about for the past few years, and they were having fun with it! That was possibly the most exciting day of my life. (At that time)


At any rate that is my experience and how I figured out I was kinky. Perhaps it was a little too young for me to figure that sort of thing out, but you know.. I knew things that would blow most 13 years old's minds. So~ yeah. Not really proud of that, but we figure things like this out at some of the weirdest times. 


~*~Anastassia~*~

30 Day BDSM Challenge: Day 2

List off Your Kinks


First off, I have many kinks, most of which I have probably talked about at some point or another. I don't know if most or some of you know this, but I identify myself as a kitty girl. So pet play is an automatic. (Actually, I haven't been able to do this in a while, and I'm hoping to change that in the near future). If you want me to be specific, I've always seen myself as a rag-doll/ragamuffin type kitty. The silver fur with black tipped ears and black paws and the ice blue eyes. So.. that's for some visual effect there.


I also love all things fire. Fire play was something I had always want to try, and thanks to Panda and Angel, I actually got to try it not too long ago, and I'm pretty addicted to it. Wax play is something else I happen to enjoy, especially if I'm in a masochistic type of mood.


I also love to be tied up in rope from time to time.


Honestly, my list could go on and on, but I'll just make a list for you all and leave it at that. I'm really not in a great mood today and I kind of just want to sleep. 


Anyways~


Kinks:


Fire play
Wax play
Pet play
Spankings/Beatings
Needle play
Cock worship
Energy play
Blood play
Vampirism
Nipple torture (I own a few nipple clamps for this reason)
Orgasm control/denial (also including forced orgasm)
Gags
Asphyxiation


Just to name a few. I could be typing up the whole list for about an hour (give or take a few minutes) before I'd be done. 


Some kinks I would like to try:


Water bondage
Electrotorture
Voyeurism


And~ I'm sure there a few others but I can't seem to think of them right now. Hope you all enjoyed this entry. Sorry it's so boring and not as super details as I was originally planning on making it. Maybe when I'm in a better mood, I'll come by and edit it and make it more fascinating. 


~*~Anastassia~*~

30-Day BDSM Challenge: Day 1

Dom, sub, switch?  What parts of BDSM interest you?  Give us an interesting in-depth definition of what that means to you. Basically define your kinky self for us.


First off, I define myself as a slave, but for this particular question, I will go with submissive. As for what parts of BDSM that interest me, a lot of it does. Currently I am living an M/s lifestyle with my Master, but I do find other lifestyles within BDSM very interesting. I will admit not every lifestyle is for everyone. For example, some people find that the DD/lg (Daddy Dom/ little girl) lifestyle works best for them, but that would never work out for me or my Master. However, I do enjoy talking to people who live lifestyles like this and learning new things. ^.^


To me, being submissive means submitting oneself to a Master/Dominant. It means finding fulfillment in submitting to one's partner and serving them because it is was makes them happy. I serve my Master because I am a lot happier this way, plus seeing Him happy is also another huge plus for me, and we both benefit from it. I make His life easier, and I also reap rewards by seeing Him happy, and sometimes I actually DO get rewarded, depending on what I do. 


Again, this is my personal feelings towards being submissive to my Master. Some people may feel similar and others may not feel this way at all. That is just the purpose of submission with my relationship.


~*~Anastassia~*~

30-Day BDSM Challenge: An Introduction

A came across this blog challenge a little bit ago and I thought to myself: "Why not?" I had been trying to think of something to write lately anyways, so what better things to write about on a blog that is meant for kink and kink related things?! =D Whoever this woman is, I am thankful she shared this, and I am pretty excited to get started on it myself. ^.^


For those of you who, for some reason, can not get the link to work (though it works for me) I'm a copying and pasting directly from the link the 30 Day Challenge questions below. Feel free to do these yourselves! ^.^

The questions I will be answering are:

• Dom, sub, switch?  What parts of BDSM interest you?  Give us an interesting in-depth definition of what that means to you. Basically define your kinky self for us.
• List your kinks.
• How did you discover you were kinky?
• Any early experiences that, in retrospect, hint at your kinks?
• What was your first kinky sexual experience?  If you haven’t had one yet, talk about what you hope to have happen.
• Describe your weirdest/most interesting sexual fantasy.
• What’s your favorite toy?
• Post a kinky image you find erotic.
• Post a kink related song or music video you enjoy.
• What are your hard limits?
• What are your views on the ethics of kink?
• Tell us about a humorous BDSM/kink experience you’ve had.  If you haven’t had one, talk about aspects of kink/BDSM you find funny.
• Explain as best you can what the appeal of kink/BDSM is to you?  Why are you drawn to what you’re drawn to?
• How would you say real life BDSM/kink varies from fantasy BDSM/kink?  If you haven’t experienced real life BDSM/kink how do you think it might differ?
• Write about a BDSM/kink activity you’re curious about and would like to try.
• What are the most difficult aspects of having a sexuality that involves kink or BDSM for you personally?
• What misconception about kinky people would you most like to clear up?
• Any kinky/BDSM pet peeves?  If so, what are they?
• Any unexpected ways kink has improved your life?  If so, what are they?
• Talk about something within kink/bdsm that you’re curious about/don’t understand.
• Favorite BDSM related book (fiction or non-fiction)
• What do you think is important in keeping a BDSM relationship healthy?  How does it differ from a vanilla relationship?
• Since you first developed an interest in kink, have your interests/perspectives changed?  How so?
• What qualities do you look for in a partner?
• How open are you about your kinks?
• What’s your opinion on online BDSM play?
• Do your non-kink interests ever find their way into your kinky activities? If so, how?
• How do you dress for kink/BDSM play?  What significance does your attire have to you?
• Do you have a BDSM title (e.g. mistress, master, slut, pig, whore, princess, goddess, ma’am, sir)?  What is your opinion of the use of titles in general?
• Whatever BDSM/kink related thing you want to write about.

Stay tuned for my first entry! ^.^

~*~Anastassia~*~

Re-establishing Dominance

Last night was the first night in weeks that Master and I were actually able to spend time alone in an empty house. Masters parents are out of town this weekend, so we have the place to ourselves. Lately we have been trying to work things out in our relationship, which also included less moments of me getting away with things when it is necessary for punishment. 


I had mentioned to Master last night that we should talk about progress, and He suddenly ordered me to take off my pants. Reluctantly, I did so and stretched myself out on the bed with my bottom facing up. He rummaged around in the closet for a short while and came out with the cane. Upon seeing it, my heart sunk. I hate the cane because it is typically used for one thing, which is punishment, and it hurts really bad. 


"Today while Mike was over earlier you cussed 22 times alone."


I tried protesting it, but that failed to get me anywhere, really. Instead I got swatted on my bottom several times with the cane. After the second swat, it started hurting pretty bad, but despite the pain, I kind of wanted it to hurt and I wanted Him to hit me a little harder. He stopped after several hard thwacks and said:


"Last weekend, you punched me in the stomach."


"I said I was sorry for that! It wasn't on purpose!"


"I know, and that is good, but you still need to be taught a lesson. Also, you forgot to ask permission to sit down several times today."


He began hitting my already sore bottom again. I honestly have no idea how many times He hit me with the cane last night, but I'm sure it was well over 30 times. After administering punishment, He leaned over and spoke into my ear 


"Now, are you sorry for the things you've done?"


"Yes... Sir.." I managed to quietly speak out.


"I want to hear in a full sentence what you are sorry for."


It took me a second, but I finally spoke back, "I'm sorry for cussing, punching you in the stomach, and for sitting down without asking for permission...."


Silence. I knew what He was waiting to hear so I spoke again. ".. Sir."


"Good girl." 


For a while I laid on the bed, bottom still exposed, and relaxed while Master ran His fingers over the welts that formed from the punishment I just endured. For some reason, when Master takes control, even if He has punished me, I get really turned on by it, and suddenly I was wanting His cock more than ever. I raised my hips off the bed, pushing myself closer to Master, in hopes He would try to take advantage of me. At first, it seemed like He was ignoring me, but finally He dipped one of His fingers into my soaking wet cunt, and I arched my back a little. He toyed with me for a little bit before we finally ended up having sex.


We took a little break to get some dinner and let our stomachs settle. Shortly after dinner we got ourselves in the shower. I always enjoy taking showers with Master, even if I don't always act like it. Even better, I love when we get to clean one another, though I think Master enjoys cleaning me off more than anything, considering every time He cleans my cunt, He always takes time to toy with my clit and such. I think He just likes playing with me, period. Another thing He really seems to love is blow jobs while in the shower as well. It was so pleasing to hear His moans, and I loved the praise I received from Him as well...


"You know you're an adorable little cock sucker, right?"


Things like that make me so happy. ^.^ 


After the shower, we came back to His room where we spent tangled up in one another. Master remained in control all night last night, and He even forced me to have several orgasms that made it very difficult for me to stand up. One thing is for sure, I think my clit is bruised from all the "abuse" that I was forced to endure. Hahahaha... Worth it. 


Plus, Master is training me to cum when He says a certain word. This sort of thing takes time, but I think it's going pretty well. ^.^ Sure lots of things that happened last night were sexual, but throughout the day, Master has definitely been showing that He is trying really hard to maintain that balance. Even today He still seems to be in this mood, which I am perfectly fine with, I only hope that this weekend continues to go well. 


Hope everyone has a fun weekend too.


~*~Anastassia~*~

Some Questions/Praise To My Readers

I know I talk a LOT about myself and my life, but I'm started to feel a little selfish. I realized I never really stopped to ask what you, my readers, would like to know from me.


So what would you all like to know or see me talk about?


Are there things you want me to blog less about?


What do you feel I should change to possibly make this blog a little more fun, intersting and enjoyable?


Should I not change anything at all?


Give me some reviews and tell me what you all think. While I do love talking about random things, and post stuff as I feel like it, I also want to appeal more to my readers, and I happen to want to know what they like to see the most about my blog, and what things they would like to see/not see more of. 


So please, feel free to comment below and give me your honest thoughts. I can handle constructive criticism, so have at it.


Thanks for reading, and thank you all for following me for as long as what you all have. I really appreciate each and every one of you, and I appreciate that you take a little time out of your lives to just do something as simple as read what I have to say, even if you all don't comment. ^.^ You all have been great to me. Thank you so much.


~*~Anastassia~*~

Redefining What Being A slave Means To Me

Every relationship has its ups and downs, but lately it seems my relationship with Master has been having more downs than ups. For the last two nights we have done almost nothing but fought, and that is not normal for us. Last night, Master threatened to take my collar away again, and I was told that I am basically not being compliant. For a second there, I almost thought He was going to say I was not worthy for the collar or for Him to be my Master. I honestly thought He was going to say that by the look in His eyes. Being as angry as I was at that moment, I almost said I didn't care, but I just kept my mouth shut. 


To be honest, a part of me didn't care, but I think that was just me being stubborn, because if He had taken it away, I'd probably be really upset right about now. Instead, He placed the collar around my neck and I haven't taken it off since. I really don't know what is going to happen to us, or if anything will happen at all, but apparently Master is going to go through some "changes" and said that I need to change too. I had told Him "Forgive me if I don't believe you."


One of our main problems is that He says He going to do something, and doesn't necessarily stick with it. So it is really hard for me to believe Him sometimes when He says He is going to do something differently. I guess only time will tell. Not all of this is His fault. I have some spots to blame on as well, and He is right, I have been fighting Him here and there. It's really hard for me to submit to someone who doesn't necessarily assert their dominance. I hate to say it, but sometimes I feel like I could be a better Dom than He can. 


Master and I still have lots to learn when it comes to this lifestyle, and we still have lots of growing up to do. I just really hope we figure something out that actually works for us. This re-evaluating stuff is getting on my nerves. *sigh*


I'm really confused, heart broken and depressed over all of this. It just feels like every time we get something right, something else goes wrong. When is there ever going to be a happy median? At any rate, it seems I have a lot to think about, and we have lots to discuss. Master should be here any minute now, and I want to be ready to talk to Him. I'll make another post later when I find out what is going to happen to us and what-not. 


~*~Anastassia~*~

The Hitachi Experience

Yesterday started off promising once I started receiving texts from Angel about how she wanted to use her Hitachi on me. Of course, how can one deny having a pretty girl play with them? ;P So I of course agreed to it, even though I was scared out of my mind, and I was nervous. Honestly, I almost backed out, but I sucked it up and it was well worth it. We'll get to that in a bit, though.


Master and I ended up going over to Angel and Panda's around 6:30. Upon arriving there, I was pretty much ordered to take off the shirt and bra I was wearing so Master could put me in the brand new corset I bought. I wanted to show it off anyways. It was kind of funny because up until that point, Panda was in the back of the apartment, so the moment he first saw me, I was shirtless in in their apartment. XD Something tells me he wasn't phased at all. Haha.


I wore the corset for a bit, but after a while, I had tot take it off, because lets face it, those things, as pretty as they are, are not really meant for comfort. It was kind of hard to breathe in it, but the pain was well worth it. Master and Panda ended up leaving to grab something to eat, and that gave Angel and I the time to catch up, and I also got to show her a few new toys that Master and I had recently bought. ^.^ 


As Master and Panda walked through the door, they saw me putting up the new vibrating glass dildo I had, and started making jokes and sarcastically saying "Oh, you were just showing it to her, huh?" Perverts. lol We all ate dinner and watched CharDee MacDennis of It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia. Which was pretty darn funny.


Shortly after the episode, that's when the fun began. We all went to the bedroom, where Master took my pants off from me, and I was tied to their bed. I remember thinking it was kind of funny that I didn't seem to care I was lying in the same bed where Angel and Panda sometimes had their relations. Honestly, that sort of thing bothers me, but not with them. It's not that I like it, but I just.. don't mind, is the best way to put it. I also remember feeling very nervous, scared, and even excited. 


The only bed I've ever been bound to was my own Master's bed, so it was definitely different. I really like the set up they had on their bed though. Really need to look into bed restraints. Though rope is nice too. Anyways, I got tied to the bed, and Angel was almost instantly between my legs with the Hitachi. At least it felt that way. When she turned it on, that buzzing noise filled my brain with so many outcomes, and I felt tense. Mainly from being nervous.


She worked on me for.. I'd say about an hour with the Hitachi Wand, and they were all surprised to see I hadn't cum a single time. I tried explaining over and over it's hard to make me cum, and really it can be, but the fact I was so nervous definitely played a part. I knew all eyes were upon me, even if it wasn't the whole entire time, and as exciting as that was, it was also scary. I will admit, though. I enjoyed it very thoroughly. 


I only felt truly bad when Master stepped in and He was the one who made me reach orgasm. A part of me felt like I had failed Angel in some form or fashion, or that I had made her feel she didn't do well. Honestly, she was very nice to me, and she really didn't do anything wrong. I really did want to cum for her. Is that.. odd to say? I'm a little upset I didn't, cause I tried letting go for her.. I really did. I just.. don't know why I just couldn't. Maybe it was several things at once, but it definitely had nothing to do with her, and I pray to God Himself that she realizes that. 


A part of me wonders if it had been just the two of us in there, and no one else looking, I might have came for her last night. I just.. I really hope it didn't damper her mood or anything. Regardless, they got to see me cum, and I think that was part of the point. I still want a Hitachi, though. Maybe some other time.


After I came down from the orgasm that Master helped me reach, we all sat around and plated some games. Which was pretty fun. I was hoping to also be able to play with Angel a bit, but she just wasn't feeling well. I could understand that, plus I noticed she was really protesting it, and I just wouldn't have felt comfortable doing anything to her, knowing that she was not 100% up for it. I didn't like hearing and seeing her upset, and I was afraid that she would have lost respect for me if I went through with it. 


I walked into the room and took her out of the arm restraints on the bed, and took off her blindfold. Knowing how sex and sexual activities can tend to be very.. sensitive for her, I suppose is the best way to put it, I ended up cradling her in my arms, telling her to calm down, and that I wasn't going to do anything against her will. She seemed to relax almost immediately, and she went from what seemed like a very tense and unhappy girl, to the happy Angel I saw earlier that evening, and that brought a certain joy into my heart. Knowing that something so simple as what I did could bring her to happiness. 


She stayed snuggled up to me for a bit, before we all went back to the living room where we spent the rest of the night talking, telling scary stories and having fun. All in all, I think last night went well, and I was very happy to see them again. After some things we covered last night, though, I found it very hard to sleep. In fact, I didn't fall asleep until sometime after 4 in the morning.


This morning, however, I realized I had left my corset at their place, so on my way to Master's place, we stopped by and retrieved the corset from Angel. She looked like she hadn't been up long, and she was so darn cute. I couldn't resist the urge to hug her and give her a kiss on the head before leaving for Master's place. 


This upcoming Saturday, there is a New Years Eve kink party going on, and it looks like Master and I may be attending. Angel and Panda are hoping to go, if neither of them fall ill and if they are feeling up to it, so I'm hoping I can see them there along with a bunch of other wonderful people I haven't seen in a while. ^.^


I suppose that is all I have to say right now, so I'm going to get back to my newest obsession, which is H.P. Lovecraft. Hope everyone has been having a great time.


~*~Anastassia~*~


P.S. If you wish to see Angel's side of the night, check it out here.

The Man In The Suit

Here we go again~! Time for another erotic story that involves some fetishes of mine. Sit down and enjoy!

I opened my eyes for the first time in what felt like hours. The first thing I noticed was that my surroundings had changed from a nice warm bedroom to a menacing looking basement. It was dark and damp in there. I couldn't quite remember how I got there in the first place, but all I know is that the floor I was lying on was made out of nothing more than concrete. It was rough, cold, and definitely uninviting. That, and I was completely naked. Wet strands of my hair clung to my face, neck and shoulders. Was it from sweat or water? Possibly both. 

I slowly pushed myself off the frigid floor and got myself on my feet. Goosebumps trailed all over my body, causing my nipples to go erect as well. I could feel the flesh of my nipples shrinking up around the bars that went through them. It kind of hurt, but I tried my best to pay no mind.

As I observed my surroundings, I noticed there was a lone light that was swinging gently from the ceiling. Below the light was a large wooden table that had some items that looked like it was bolted down to it. I slowly made my way to the table for a close examination of it. I slid my stiff fingers over the thick black metal, which felt colder than the room itself. From the looks of it, it seemed as if these were shackles bolted to each corner of the table, and if they were clamped around someone's wrists or ankle, there was no way to get out of them. 

I didn't have much time to look at anything else in the room before the door off to the left side of the room was pushed wide open to show a man in the doorway. My eyes widened in fear as I took a step back. I couldn't really tell what he looked like, but something told me he had a devilish grin on his face. That's when he spoke in that deep voice of his.

"Ahhh.. I see the girl has finally woke from her slumber. Did you sleep well my dear?"

"No, considering I left on that freezing cold concrete floor. Where the hell am I, and why am I here?"

The man snickered before replying. "My dear girl, you are here because you have yet to learn any discipline. I am here to teach it to you and see you learn it well."

With that last word ringing in the air, the man started advancing on me, cornering me against the wall behind me. He grabbed my wrists with his strong hands and pinned me to the stone wall. Chills went up my spine and I finally got a good look at his face. He was definitely handsome, what with his black slicked back hair, and facial hair. Not to mention those piercing green eyes that were now staring directly into mine. 

"Ready to have some fun?" A dark grin spread across his face, and I knew there was no turning back. I tried fighting out of his grip, but he was too strong for me. I heard a menacing laugh come from deep within his throat shortly before he flung me into the table. The impact stunned me just long enough for him to hoist me onto the table and quickly lock my ankles and wrists into place. 

"That's.. going to leave a bruise... What ever happened to playing nice?" I hissed at him, almost in a taunting manner. 

"Oh love, by the time I'm through with you, you're going to have more things to worry about than just a small bruise on your abdomen."

A crackling loud noise cut through the air like a knife and I jerked my head to look up at him. Now that we were under the light, I could see everything. His tall sleek body clothed by a business suit that was decorated in thin white pin stripes against the black of his outfit. In his right hand was a dark brown leather braided whip that looked like it was over 6 feet long. I felt a lump form in my throat and a sudden urge to try and force myself free. When did he even grab that thing? Where did it come from? The hell is going o-?

CRACK! 

All thoughts left my head as the most vicious stinging pain rushed across the now reddening line forming on my stomach. Speechless as ever, I only stared at him in horror, my mouth gaping wide open. I saw him smirk right before he dealt another hard blow to my thighs.

CRACK!

"AH! The fuck is this for?!" I screamed at him, anger infused onto my reddening face. I felt my body tense up knowing another blow was soon to come, and it did, and it hurt far worse than the first two.

CRACK!

Again on my thighs, right next to the other mark he left just seconds ago. Aching from the pain, I couldn't really fight much against him as he unlocked the shackles on the table and flipped me over onto my stomach only to lock them back in place. I winced as the welt forming on my abdomen pulsed with pain from the pressure of me lying on it. He then started back on me again, hitting my back and the back of my legs.

CRACK!

CRACK!

CRACK!

CRACK!

Just one right after the other. All I could manage to do was scream in agony and let the tears flow willingly. Nothing could save me from this monster now.

I can't tell how long this went on, but I do know that by the time he stopped, I was drenched yet again in a cold sweat, and my body was covered in deep red welts. Some of which were starting to bleed. I remember hearing my own sobs midst his own diabolical laughter.

"Ahhh.. I just love seeing those lovely tears of precious girls such as yourself. It's quite the turn on, really."

Despite being already weak and tired, I managed to growl out a "Fuck you" to the man dealing out all the pain I've been dealt so far.

"Only if you insist." He replied cooly as he unzipped his pants to expose his rock hard cock. Fear pierced through my heart in a split second, and I knew this man was going to take advantage of me. He's already whipped me till my blood has shed. Surely he wouldn't be nice enough to not fuck me. He slowly made his way to me and lifted my head up with his warm left hand. He brought his face down to my level and pressed his lips to mine. Kissing me rather tenderly, almost lovingly, for someone who was being so cruel just moments ago. 

I had no other choice but to take it, really, and it wasn't before too long that his tongue pried my lips open and started searching my mouth. It was tempting to bite down on his tongue, but considering I hadn't really done much to him in the first place, I didn't dare take my chances. Eventually he parted his lips from mine, but only to replace his tongue with his cock which shoved hard, deep into my throat.

I gagged hard on his rather large member and resisted the urge to vomit. This was when he grabbed me by the hair and forced me to stay still as he thrust himself in and out of my throat. No matter how hard I gagged or how much I tried protesting against it, he just kept going till he shot thick ribbons of his cum into my mouth. My first reaction was to spit it out, but he quickly clamped my jaws together with his hands and stared me in the eyes.

"Swallow it you filthy slut!" 

I tried shaking my head loose from his grasp, but failed miserably, and had no other choice but to comply. Reluctantly, I swallowed every last bit of his cum. Once he released my head, I immediately started gagging, feeling the pressing urge to vomit yet again. I could feel the thick fluid flowing down my throat still, and I've never felt more nauseated in my life.

"Oh calm down! You know you enjoyed it. Want me to prove it to you?"

"No! No! Don't do it! Please! Just leave me alone!" I sobbed back at him.

Of course, it didn't stop him from walking around the table to dip his fingers into my tight cunt. 

"See how wet you are my little angel? Completely soaking wet!" He laughed at my despair and walked back over to where he could look at my face. "Would you like a taste?" He lightly licked at his wet fingers, clearly dripping with my fluid.

"No.. Please. Just, please do-!" I was cut off by him shoving his cum soaked fingers into my mouth. I was forced to taste yet more cum, this time it was sweet and thin, much unlike his salty thick cum.

"Clean off my fingers. I know you want to. You're a filthy cum slut, and you just can't resist getting a mouthful, can you?"

"No.." I managed to muffle a reply between sucking on his fingers.

"No? Just 'No'? I think I need to teach you some manners, girl. You will address me by saying 'Sir'. Is that understood?"

I paused for a moment to look at him through damp eyes. "Yes... Sir."

"Good girl! Now, we've only gotten started. Shall we continue?"

He withdrew his fingers from my mouth and put his now slightly flaccid cock back into his pants. Taking his time, he unlocked all four of the shackles on the table and picked me up, only to place me in an empty glass tank. From the looks of it, it was a giant fish tank. 

"What is this for?"

"Well.. considering you're all dirty and covered in blood... Lets just say you're going to get a nice bath."

He walked over to the right corner of the room and pulled a lever on the wall. The sounds of rushing water filled the room as warm water poured from the ceiling above me an into the glass tank I was in. Gallons and gallons of water rushed over me and filled up this tank in a mere few minutes. He released the lever and the water finally stopped gushing out all over the place.

What happened next was possibly scarier than anything else in this world. The man walked over to me and placed his head gently on the top of my head. 

"Lets see how long you can hold your breath!" 

Suddenly I was forced under the water, and being held there against my will. I hadn't had a chance to take a breath of air or anything, and my instinct was to flail and struggle. He pulled me up by my hair and draped me over the edge of the tank. I coughed and gagged, and I think I may have tasted my own blood that was slowly turning the water a light shade of pink. 

Again and again I was forced to engulf water into my lungs, and I was starting to feel the effect of water torture sinking into my head, slowly cracking that mental barrier of mine. At least the water was warm, right? He finally pulled me out of the tank and threw me to the floor.

"Have you had enough yet, girl?"

"Y-yes~!" I gasped for air and clung to the floor like a beaten and scared animal. Trying to seek for a shelter I knew I'd never find in this basement of horror.The man was now sitting next to me on the wet floor. He picked me up and placed me sitting in his lap. He cradled me in his arms for a short minute, before whispering into my ear, "You're not done till I say you're done. Is that understood?"

I started crying again as I managed to reply "Yes sir." Surprisingly, all of this torture was arousing to me, and the urge to resist him was getting harder and harder. Maybe it was the random cuddles in between, slowly causing Stockholm Syndrome set in, or maybe I really enjoyed this sort of sadistic attention. As I sat there on his lap, I could feel his cock hardening against my bottom. I knew it was only a matter of time before he'd use me again, and I knew that time would be now. 

He scooped me into his arms after standing up, walked to the table, placed me on my back, and closed the shackles back down on me. He slowly undressed himself, taking his time to expose what looked like soft pale skin tightly clinging to his toned abdomen. His arms were a little buff too, and it's no wonder why it was hard for me to fight against him. I never stood a chance in the first place. 

Next to come off were his pants, exposing his whole entire beautiful figure. I felt myself melt into the table as he climbed on top of me and pushed his cock into my soaking wet cunt. As he pleasured himself with my body, I felt his hot tongue slide across the wounds on my body, licking up some of the bits of blood still clinging to me. 

As he thrust in and out of me, some strands of his hair fell out of place, dangling in front of his forehead. He bit at my shoulders and throat, leaving little red teeth marks all over me. Each thrust was harder than the last, and I could tell he was getting closer. He grabbed my arms, digging his nails into my skin as he thrust into me one last time. I felt that hot sticky fluid rush into my womb, some of it squirting out of me. 

Our breathing was ragged and sharp as he lay his head upon my chest. "Now.." gasp "Now you're..." gasp "done...."

After he regained some of his strength, He unlocked me from the table, scooped me into his arms and walked through the door. The door led to some stairs in which he took me up. At the top of the stairs was yet another door. He kicked the door open to show that we were just below the bedroom I was in only hours ago the whole time. 

He drew a bath for me and gently washed my body free of all the blood sweat and tears. He tended to my wounds and kissed my body gently.

"You did so well, darling. You're such a wonderful slave, you know that?" 

"Yes sir." I replied weakly with a smile.

Now, lets get you to bed. We have much to discuss in the morning. With that, he dried me off and placed me into the king sized bed. I was finally free, and I was able to rest safely in what became my Masters arms.

Hope you all enjoyed it, and yes, the twist at the end is that it was my Master the whole time. XD Sorry for confusing anyone! Hope it was a good read. ^.^ More stories to come in the future. 

Fondest Memory of Submission

Master has requested of me, today, that I write of my "fondest memory of my submission and servitude" to Him. This is, without a doubt, going to be a tough one considering I have lots of fond memories of our relationship thus far. The key thing, though, is that He wants me to write about when I've felt "most submissive" to Him. Considering I feel really submissive most of the time towards Him, this may be a little on complicated side. But hey, I enjoy complication to an extent, and I certainly love a challenge, so here we go.


I think the incident that sticks out the most to me, was shortly after we decided to re-evaluate our M/s lifestyle and relationship. We had been through some tough times, and to be honest, things were not looking so hot between us. I was being snarkier than ever, saying awful things to Him, and most of all, I was being highly disobedient. I certainly was not acting the way a slave should to present their Master well. (Not saying there is a right and wrong way, but I was acting "wrong" for ME and by MY usual standards).


To put it simple, Master ended up putting me in my place, and it was definitely for the better. He was hard on me, and it was the first time I've ever seen Him act like that. He locked me in the bathroom, cold, naked and blindfolded, and I was basically sentenced to silence until He saw it fit. He put me through tests, and He actually got into my head and it was a bit on the scary side. 


It was respectable, though. 


That day, I felt completely and utterly in the palm of His hands. Before too long, He had gained back all control of me, and I felt something stir deep within me that can very much resemble passion, commitment, and a new found respect for Him. By the end of that evening, I had somehow learned my lesson, and I had realized that what I had done was wrong, and I needed to change myself for both of us. I learned that there was (and always is) still room to grow, and I had LOTS of growing up to do. 


Ever since then, I have learned to hold my tongue a lot better, think before I speak, and I have learned to keep Him in my regards no matter what I do or say. As His slave, and companion, not only do I need to serve Him well, but I need to present myself in ways that would best represent Him as the wonderful person He is. 


I cried back then, but now that things have changed, and we've grown a bit more, I am very happy that we went through that because it has helped us a lot. There is nothing else in this world that has made me respect Him as much, and admire Him as much as that day, and I thank Him for that.


~*~Anastassia~*~

Bag O' Goodies

So I realized something last week, and I had been meaning to do this for some time now, but I never seemed to get the chance to do it. That is, until today. Quite often, I talk about scening with Master, and I talk about all the fun stuff we do, and some of the items we use, but I've never really shown my readers what all is being used. So dig in, guys. I have a pleasant surprise for all of you today!


Here are our toys thus far. 

Newest addition to the fun. Glass dildo of the icicles collection.

Crop. ^.^

Our collection of gags.

Nipple clamps. <3

Mr. Thuddy, and Ms. Stingy. lol

Some miscellaneous things. Hoorah for bondage games. lol 

Play collars. The black one was given to us by Angel a long time ago.

Vaginal vibrator with wireless remote. Anal beads, and wartenburg wheel.

Can't forget rope!

Good ol' Cane of Doom. Made by Panda, and made for beating. 

"Do You Wish To Indulge?"

These are the words that will probably forever resonate within my mind till the day I die....


What started as a normal day for Master and I, ended up not only being one of the best nights of my life, but possibly, one of the best things that has ever happened to me. 


We wen't out to dinner around 6 this evening, and Master let me have my favorite food, rare steak with roasted vegetables. Later on we decided to head out to The Lions Den where we found this pretty nifty looking riding crop, that seemed sturdy enough to handle the beatings I so love to take. We also bought a sexy outfit, and a little bondage game. 


After heading back to Master's place, we decided to head up stairs to try out our new toys. The crop feels nice and has just the right amount of sting that I love. We decided to name her Victoria. (Silly, I know, but I love it). ^.^ We also tried out the little game we bought, which had fifty cards of "naughty, kinky scenarios" on each of them.


At first.. it started off a little.. well... It didn't go well, but eventually it let to what became the best fucking sex I have EVER had in my life. Seriously.. I don't think anything is going to hold a candle to this evening for a LONG~ time!


Master read a card to Himself, and had this devilish grin on His face, and immediately, I knew something was about to go down. He had my blindfold myself, and told me to prop myself against the head board of the bed, and spread my legs for Him. He then told me to start masturbating in front of Him.


Alright... simple enough. I had done this before, so I was easy to comply and go along with it. I began rubbing my clit gently. Slow, at first. Taking my time. Next thing I know, Master is asking me to describe how I am feeling. (Guys.. sorry if my grammar and words seem off. I'm still trying to wrap my head around this. You have no idea how mind blowing this was). So I began telling Him how I felt. How I noticed my muscles were already clenching in my legs, and I could feel the inside of my cunt starting to pulsate as I became wetter from the stimulation. 


This went on for a while, and suddenly.. Master said something that He has never said to me before, and somehow... it was the perfect trigger phrase. I heard Him in front of me, His voice seemingly closer. "Do you wish to indulge?" His voice was deep, and enticing. Almost hypnotic with the way He said it. All I could mutter was an incoherent "Uh.. huh?" 


"I said, do you wish to indulge?"


"I- I have no idea why you are saying this, but yes, Master...~!"


"Then indulge!"


His voice was so full of dominance, and His command hit the spot. Suddenly I was feeling closer than before. All because He said those words and the way He said them.


He told me to pay attention to my surroundings, and asked me if I noticed anything different, and almost instantly I realized that something was different. He was a lot closer, and I had just caught on. I also started noticing that His breath was hot on my dripping wet cunt, and each time He spoke, a puff of warm air hit me just right, and I started to squirm. My fingers started going faster around and on my clit, and again I heard...


"Do you wish to indulge?"


and again, I couldn't resist Him. My words were so spaced out between gasps of breath that I had to yell "Yes! yes, Master, I do!"


"Then INDULGE!"


This sent me into a frenzy. I was frantically stimulating myself, praying for a release, but nothing came. No matter how hard I tried, I just could not cum. Something was missing, but what was it? And as hard as I was trying, next came the stream of tears, but it was not from frustration. In fact, I have no idea why I was crying. I just was, and it felt so good to be so raw like that in front of Him.


"Do you need something, Anastassia?"


"Yes Master. I need your cock!"


"Oh? You do? You what to say..."


It was like I could feel Him smirking beneath my blinded eyes. Without hesitation I began begging, telling Him I needed His cock to cum for Him.


"You need my cock? It's the only way for you to cum, isn't it, Anastassia?"


"Yes, Master!!! Yes!!"


"Then you know what's next, right?" He said as His cock entered into me with diligent ease.


"It's time to cum, Anastassia?" I questioned, as these were the words He used when He wanted me to cum.


"It's time to cum, Anastassia."


That voice... that sweet dominant voice He used while thrusting into me. It was the key, and just as it had started, it ended with a huge finale that sent me into a writhing cumming pile of goo under Him. What was originally so hard for me to do this whole, instantly became easier once He commanded me to cum with His hard cock deep within me. 


I remember crying out louder than I ever had before, and literally crying at the same time. My body arched beneath His, and trembled with the most powerful release I have ever experienced. He stopped momentarily, to hold me and calm me down. I was sobbing. Sheer pleasure had me in it's grip, and only He could get it to let go.... and He did. 


Usually, I would be able to go on, and rock my hips with His, coaxing Him to cum, but instead, I couldn't move as He used me till He was cumming as well.


This post does not, and never will, do justice for what actually happened here tonight.... I have never felt closer and more loved by a person than I do right now.


I seriously... my brain is numb... 


I just wanted to post this really quick before I lost my last bit of energy and passed out.


I have a feeling this weekend is going to be the best weekend of my life.


Lol... the cum stain in front of me is so huge... 


This is... just... Thank you Master.. You fucking drive me crazy, and I love you.


Goodnight all.


Totally spent....


~*~Anastassia~*~